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Universal Medicine Cult June 2014 Gossip – Part 2 – overflow

Ass-ended-MasterJune 29: Cults become a perversion of commerce June 28: Before and after special June 24: *Reporting the UM Scam *What happened to the EPA Con-ference and the Twitter bullies? *More scapegoats, more history rewritten June 22: Sunday Telegraph story & response to the cult’s reaction  June 21:  Buy the Sunday Telegraph tomorrow! June 20: *Universal Medicine dot net *Welcome to the Naming Names page Mystic dentist IV Dr Alannah Freer of Brisbane

I told you June would be a humdinger month for UM gossip, so here we are with instalment two and updates.

If you haven’t found it already, some more of the cult’s response week to the Sunday Tele and ABC reports, including comments from Lance and I on the ABC interview of College of UM director, Brisbane commercial litigation barrister and Way of the Livingness devotee, Charles Wilson, are found on College of Universal Medicine Media Madness.

June 29: Cults become a perversion of commerce

– according to a Financial Times article. And UniMed is the exemplary case study.

George Orwell once wrote: “I have always thought there might be a lot of cash in starting a new religion.” Over the years a number of entrepreneurs have clearly listened to the great author of Animal Farm – often with sinister results.

Most cults are really businesses dressed up as spiritual organisations. Beneficial tax statuses of such bogus churches may act as an extra incentive…Founders discover that rather than start a conventional company by selling the public products they choose to buy, it can be easier to bamboozle vulnerable people into becoming devotees, who then hand over a tithe.

In the case of the Church of $erge, the ‘healer’s healer’ scams vulnerable people to buy his money for nothing product and services – repeatedly – with the promise they will improve their status on his ‘initiation’ scale, prevent disease and improve their reincarnations. If they relent on the expenditure they are threatened with the opposite, with the bonus of having their family members ‘entered’ by entities. He labels that Love®, Glory® and Truth®.

Cults take many aspects of traditional faiths such as Christianity, and then distort them. Recurring themes within cults are nepotism, byzantine hierarchy, secrecy, the hunger to own lots of property and commercial incompetence. But the nastiest characteristic of all is the abuse and brainwashing of adherents…

The commercial incompetence is a given. Characters like Serge can’t make millions by going straight. He didn’t do so well at the tennis coaching, and if he didn’t dress up some substandard bodywork with bogus supernatural claims, he’d be broke. Recent reports in the US showed that Scientology’s accounts aren’t too healthy, even with all their profiteering and slave labour.

Cults are perversions of both genuine religions and capitalism. They dupe gullible people into becoming virtual slaves, exploiting their labour and savings to enrich the controllers of the cult. Capitalism is the free exchange of services for reward – not the coercion of disciples being manipulated by tinpot dictators. 

June 28: Before and After Special!

UM recently launched their AMAZING new site with a stunning page of portraits of Esoteric students before and after they bought UM’s ‘religion’. A few of them actually look better in the after shots.

The most telling transformation, however, was missing:

Before Initiating the UniMed Trust

Serge_Image 2006




Anyway, because we’re loveless and in pain and enjoy nothing more than a bit of jealousy, comparison and the evil of competition, we were not to be outdone, and thought we should thrust forth our own miraculous transformations from before our lengthy accountability bunker interlude, and after. In fact, we’re so impressed with ourselves we might start taking donations to spruce up our concrete box so we can run courses, overcharge for them and become a tax exempt COLLEGE.

That is really a church.

Princess and Venus before Exposure and Accountability




Binky the Pranic Primate (aka Serge’s ghostwriter) before excommunication

the ghost writer


After (newly appointed President of Goonellabah Chamber of Commerce)

Studio portrait of chimp wearing suit

June 24: Reporting the UM Scam

Were you told Esoteric healing modalities could help symptoms or health conditions? Did you undertake Esoteric courses under the impression you could become an accredited practitioner? Did you sign up to the Esoteric Practitioners Association under the impression it was the only way to acquire professional indemnity insurance? Were you sold professional indemnity insurance under the impression you were acquiring it at a discounted rate? Have you donated money to building funds or charities under the impression the student body would ‘own their own building’ or based on any other misleading claims?

Please report any such rip offs to NSW Fair Trading. Ph 13 32 20

Online complaints can be made here.

You can also make an anonymous complaint, but that can only be done by post to:

NSW Fair Trading

PO Box 972 

NSW  2124

Other gossip – a big blogging day, the EPA Annual CON-ference and the cult’s disappearing Twitter bullies

Sunday was a hectic day in the bunker. Princess tried out  Mojito recipes in commemoration of the World Cup. The Lords of Form got into a scuffle over the remote control between the Rugby, the World Cup replays and replays of Real Single Housewives of Goonellabah. I was dealing with comms. It was a record day for pageviews on the blogs – bigger than the first time I called UM vipers the ‘Brides of Serge’ and got 900 hits. Much bigger. UM’s intimidation attempts have brought us significant support in Australia, and we had lots of hits from the UK thanks to some influential tweeters with strong concerns about Serge’s rubbish being propagated through the NHS.

UM might want to take heed. Their propaganda is only fooling themselves.

Lance gave an interview on ABC Radio North Coast this morning resulting in Mr Important Barrister pants, Charles Wilson and the Brides throwing legal threats at the ABC. I imagine the North Coast office is now being bombarded by the spam army – because that’s a more credible response than answering the questions.

Otherwise, the Esoteric Practitioners Association Annual Con-ference, celebrating the accreditation scam, defamation and bullying, was scheduled on the UM 2014 events calendar for Sunday June 22. The Lord of Form and I had a good old evil lodge chuckle when we realized it would coincide with the Sunday Tele coverage. But it looks like the thing didn’t happen. Perhaps they were overwhelmed by all their Esoteric integrity.

Anyway, if anyone knows how much they charge for tickets, please let us know.

And I noticed a couple of anonymous Twitter trolls lurking around calling me a psychotic cyberbully and internet troll, lol. I tweeted about it, and then rolled into bed, but when I went back to invite them to come here and answer some questions about psychosis and sightings of the Four Lords of Form on horseback, they were no longer there. Either one of our friends reported them, or they pulled their heads in and cancelled their accounts. One was called @ralop2 and had a tiger as an avatar. So @ralop2, I notice you didn’t have the guts to approach me with those remarks – but you’re welcome to post any of your innermost feelings here in the comments. Comments are always open.

History rewritten – how UM attracted media attention

The cult’s current line is that Lance generated initial media attention by conning journalists from four media organizations. Then they reckon he and I have gone on to con another six. So ten media organizations and their lawyers have now proven themselves incapable of fact checking and left themselves wide open for a legal claim. Yet, all those ‘defamatory’ and ‘sensationalist’ reports ‘remain online’ persecuting Serge’s unisex Sons of God and their Glorious scam because UM is above following through with defamation action. Apparently.

So what did  Serge do with the money he collected for the cult’s legal fund?

We’ve never received a legal notice for our blogs, by the way. Just a bunch of defamatory bullshit posted online.

Anyway, in case anyone actually believes Lance and I are fooling the media, the journalists’ attention was drawn by the TGA press release about their investigation of the dodgey labelling of the Eso Herbs. Rumblings about the grubby practice of Esoteric Breast Massage had been going on for a while.

UK healthcare activists and doctors Andy Lewis (8000+ followers) and Ben Goldacre (328,000 followers globally), tweeted about EBM in February 2012.

EBM Tweets 2012

Their tweets inspired sensible Twitter responses.

EBM Tweets 2 2012

The Twitter timeline can be found here.

The point is, Lance didn’t need to generate media interest. You can’t advertise something as tacky as EBM without drawing attention. It was building for quite some time.

June 22: Links to the Sunday Tele story can be found on with my response to their reaction: Demented Hyperbole

June 21: Sunday Telegraph June 22 edition

At dawn, scuttle out and grab a copy of the Sunday Telegraph for the latest UM story. I’m yet to find out if it’ll be in News Ltd papers in other cities, so check here for an update or watch my tweets.

Word on the wire is Serge appears to be somewhat emotional about the prospect of a story tomorrow. You’d better mind your health, Sergio, emotions give you cancer, remember?

Charlie Wilson has put on his barrister pants and has been huffing and puffing down the phone to a few folk.

Anyway, who wants to bet Serge’s wowser army are already writing their spam letters to News Ltd expressing outrage over media bias and how the Tele should report the ‘real’ story (the cult version).

The article hasn’t been published yet.

And what are the chances any of the cult’s hierarchy answered the questions?

June 20: Universal Medicine dot net

Overnight UM launched it’s new site at a dot net address to compete with the dot com dot au address. Because when your eight propaganda sites aren’t convincing anyone but yourselves, the logical thing to do is launch three more. It’s a lot easier than coming back down to earth. Apparently.

So what’s the difference between the new dot net site and the old dot com site?

In brief, it’s the same misleading, non transparent marketing of the same money for nothing products and services, but with new pictures.

And my, hasn’t cult photographer, Clayton Lloyd been busy? Especially with the hilarious new before and after pictures page, and a bunch of other loved up images of Serge’s religious investors.

UM has come out of the closet properly as a religion on the site, plugging belief in emotionless self-love and love of humanity lol, and one’s innermost spiritless soul. (Spirit is gradually removed by Serge & Co. for a large and ongoing fee).

Otherwise Serge’s spherical blurbs have had their word count cut down, or out, because Serge’s putrid hogwash is damaging the brand by making it look like a cult. Replaced of course with Real Media Real Change’s putrid PR hogwash that makes UM look like a cult, after a bumbling check through by UM’s STELLAR legal team.

Otherwise, the Doctors have truly lowered themselves with some ill advised endorsements, including of the Esoteric Practitioners Association Pty Ltd, which can’t possibly be a SCAM, because it has the highest code of conduct and integrity and professionalism in the world! Eunice Minford and Dr Maxine Szramka SAY SO.

So how much are tickets to the EPA Pty Ltd annual conference Dr Szramka? On top of the annual membership fee and the 30% or so mark up on reselling the professional indemnity insurance…And where does that money end up? Hm?

We’ll have to wait for a leak for an answer to that one – seeing the glowing testimonials about nothing left no room for a fee structure or price list.

Dr Szramka is also talking up UM with some misleading crap about preventative health:

Why wait to treat disease when it can be prevented?

Yes, Dr Szramka, a certain amount of disease can be prevented – but not the way you’re endorsing, by joining Sergio’s shonky religion.  Do you tell your rheumatoid arthritis patients they got RA because they’re angry with their parents? It’s Serge’s One Unified Truth isn’t it? Have you ever challenged it? Didn’t think so. Do you then offer your RA patients a script for anti-depressants to add to their NSAIDS?

Finally, how come Serge isn’t defaming us on that site? Or is that sacred love of humanity restricted to the RMRC ‘student intiative®’ and his human shields?

Welcome to the Naming Names page Dr Alannah Freer of Kenmore, Brisbane

Another mystic dentist and mother of GP, Dr Amelia Stephens. How old was Amelia when you dragged her into the UM scam, Dr Freer?


6 Comments on “Universal Medicine Cult June 2014 Gossip – Part 2 – overflow”

  1. pranabunny says:

    Ah the infamous “before and after” project. I have it straight from the horse’s mouth that this has been in the making a long, long time and that participants were specifically instructed to provide “before” photos “where they are overweight and/or look ugly”.

    The fact that the UM brides had to specifically dig out photos of themselves they don’t like to put next to photos taken by a professional photographer after they had their hair and make up done speaks volumes. If you want to believe that UM has changed your life for the better, all you need to do is look at a photo of yourself that was taken in the 90s. Bad perm, bad glasses, bad make-up and 90s fashion…it’s nothing to do with UM, it’s the way you dressed, darling.
    But confirmation bias means that you will filter reality according to your expectations and those expectations, repeatedly reinforced by your like-minded friends, are that you feel and look a lot better, now that you follow the rules and stipulations of one certain Serge Benhayon.

    Here’s a little refresher course in basic sociology (thank you, David McRaney):

    “Confirmation bias is a filter through which you see a reality that matches your expectations. It causes you to think selectively, but the real trouble begins when confirmation bias distorts your active pursuit of facts…[…]

    Whether or not pundits are telling the truth, or vetting their opinions, or thoroughly researching their topics is all beside the point. You listen to them not for information, but for confirmation.

    You seek out safe havens for your ideology, friends and coworkers of like mind and attitude, media outlets guaranteed to play nice. Whenever your opinions or beliefs are so intertwined with your self-image you couldn’t pull them away without damaging your core concepts of self, you avoid situations which may cause harm to those beliefs.”


    • Lord of Form says:

      That’s it in spades. Confirmation bias on steroids. I know for a fact that they are only convincing themselves. A little real world road test gives it two thumbs down. This new site looks more culty than the last. The glazed eyes, the gormless grins and the prostrations before the master do little to dispel that distinct impression that whacks you about the head as you click through their site spellbound at its utter stupidity.

      I’ve had a great belly laugh at the set ups, especially ‘Serge the writer’ and (highly invested) members reading the results of those merciless word strangulations. Priceless. And as you’ve rightly said, the ‘before and afters’ demonstrate a yearning to deceive themselves greater perhaps than the public Serge hopes to hoodwink with his new-look G-rated site.

      Frankly a lot of the ‘students’ (not followers or members of a group remember) look a lot far more interesting before they sat down for an audience with Clayton the clicker to do their best Mona-Lisa impressions.

      And Serge, I preferred the Adults Only sites from pre-June 2012, available at the way back machine and never going away.

      But on a serious note, the doctors promoting the EPA urgently need a 100 cc’s of reality, stat!. Perhaps they think an image of a leather bound copy of the ‘code of ethics’ makes the thing they’re endorsing real? Well it isn’t, and its deceptive and misleading. And they are complicit. Very complicit.

      Two years on and I continue to be flabbergasted how deep self-deceptions and denials will go to ward off facts that inconveniently intrude on a collective fantasy. It’d be fascinating if it wasn’t so frightening.

    • Darkly Venus says:

      The cult totally stole the before and after pic idea from my 2012 before and after post.

      And I totally stole it from TV Week magazine ads circa 1979.

      I read more of that site last night and words cannot describe the horror. The sheer audacious inanity of the music page that claims Serge has written ‘some of the most beautiful and powerful songs ever written.’ Or the insane pseudoscientific claim on the ‘nutrition’ page:

      For fifteen years Universal Medicine has been at the ‘cutting edge’/forefront of education, offering a world first cardio centric (heart centred) approach to eating, healing and living.

      What. The. Fuck?

      Endorsed by doctors.

      And the cult is arguing there’s no such thing as brainwashing. Which leaves few explanations for that mess. They’re either hopelessly stupid, completely insane, or bloody minded mercenaries.

      Or all of the above.

    • SubRosa says:

      Is it me, suffering confirmation bias, or do most of them have third degree gum disease…?

  2. SubRosa says:

    Interesting article from the Financial Times…

    Might give ‘Great exposing article Andy’ a couple of
    Points to ponder on.

  3. Anonymous says:

    Love the before and after!